Waltz In Exile


Moribund
19 November 2010, 5:35 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized

So.

Hi.

I still don’t know what to do.  I’m still broken.  I’m working on it, but I can’t tell how it’s going.  I don’t know if it’s getting better, or if I just care less than I did.

There’s a lot going on.  A LOT lot.   There always was, but this year has felt like Mach3 with my hair on fire.  I’m not the same person (mother, wife, blogger, friend, daughter, employee, sister, woman….) I was when I started writing here.

In many ways, this is a good thing.  But I don’t know where that leaves me.  Or this blog.

I’m not sure who I am anymore.  I don’t think I ever knew, actually.  I was too busy to notice.  Part of the broken is that I realized it.  So I’m trying to figure out who I WANT to be, what I want this blog to be.

I promise to think about it tomorrow morning at 7:30, when I am here.  No, really.  (I TOLD you there was a lot going on.)

It’ll be a fantastic distraction from my usual OhSweetVishnuWHATWASITHINKING???

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11 Comments so far
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I have no idea what I want to be when I grow up. Except I don’t think I really *want* to grow up. The rest of it I just do by the seat of my pants.

Comment by Corrina

Yeah, um, I’m trying to decrease the size involvement of the seat of my pants….

Comment by waltzinexile

Well, first things first, of course we’ll all be hanging around to see what comes of it all. But, second things second, I really don’t think that any of us are one fixed being. I think we just continue to evolve and mature and change throughout our whole lives. Which is really heartening because it means that when I feel like a feral weasel lately, there’s at least a chance I’ll grow out of it.

As for Mach 3 with your hair on fire, all I’ll say is that you’re doing smashingly well, really. Although, actually, um… I don’t think your hair was on fire. I think it had auburn highlights. But I can see as how you’d be confused what with everything zooming along so fast. Anyway, that’s what friends are for. To tell you it’s just highlights and that you’re growing, changing, blooming.

Comment by Marzie

One of the things I’ll be thinking about tomorrow morning is how to show my gratitude for all of you fantastic friends who are helping me make sense of all of this… MmmmmWUH

Comment by waltzinexile

Are you still living in Exile?

Comment by Allison

I am. But we’ve been planning our escape with more urgency this year, and it’s sorta crossyourfingersandsendusyourbestjuju possible that we won’t be for much longer…
The list of things I wouldn’t give to need a new blog name? Short. Shorty McShorterson. Like, this –>|| short. Sho, even.

Comment by waltzinexile

It’s funny how I always thought that “knowing thyself” was an inevitable consequence of living. Imagine my shock when I realized, not too long ago myself, that finding out who I was would take actual…thinking. And direction. And effort. I’ve started to think of it less as “who I am” and more “who I could be.” Good luck.

If you are a music person, as in, someone who finds music helpful certain phases, can I recommend Shawn Colvin’s “These Four Walls”? It helps me.

Comment by Cherie

THIS.
So totally THIS.
Also – damn you expanding my musical horizons. Curses!

Comment by waltzinexile

Awake in bed last night contemplating a request by my friend to run the 4.1 mile turkey trot with her, I thought of MSW: Did she run it? How did she do? Did I miss a tweet? I need to check my email archives and find the date she mentioned? Five miles, right?

And then today, I just randomly checked this blog — as I do now and then, wistfully – of course. And here is a post, a witty link and the date of your run.

How was the effing run, dude?

Comment by jodi

Run it. Do it. DO IT!

Comment by waltzinexile

[…] Mrs. Waltz – absent for like, forever! And she sneaks in a well-crafted, intelligent post with her characteristic wit — oh and a super-smart link, which reminds me how clever she is, […]

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