Waltz In Exile


Lacuna

It’s not like I haven’t been doing anything worth writing about.  Some of it, I feel like I don’t have the talent to write about adequately, because it was SO awesome (see: Tous les comtesses; BlogHer ’10; family wedding; ran my first two 5Ks EVER.)  Some of it, I was too tired after living/experiencing/dealing with it to write about (see: Husband gets Master’s degree & turns 40 [aka June]; ran my first two 5Ks EVER.)  Some of it, I’m in too much of a funk to write about (see: Still in Exile; still hate job; still 40.) 

Some of it, I’m still processing and don’t quite know what to think/say/share about it…. And some of it was never for public consumption, anyway, so it didn’t get written about.  Actually, a lot of it was stuff I wouldn’t feel comfortable sharing.  Out of nowhere last year, my life became overwhelmingly about a bunch of stuff I don’t want to write about.  Not yet, anyway.

Question: Writer’s block: brings about depression?  Or is it the depression that brings about writer’s block?  Is it a dysfunctional symbiotic relationship?  Like anxiety and cookies?

This is going to be all over the place.  I’m new at this all over again.  Bear with me.

So.  The biggest thing right now: I think I’m trying to become a runner.  All you ACTUAL runners out there: go ahead and laugh until you puke.  I’ll wait.

Back so soon?  Okay, then.  I’m not sure what started it, really, except that I’d begun working out again a lot, and enjoying it, and really noticing a difference in my stamina.  And then a friend of mine started C25K, and I thought “that doesn’t sound so bad…” and then my firm offered to sponsor a team for THIS and so my friend and I registered and ran it together.

It. Was. AWESOME.

Twenty minutes after I got home from my first race ever, friend and I were all over the web looking for another one to enter (there was a very “totally stoned and raiding the pantry for cookies” vibe to it.) (Don’t pretend you don’t know what I mean.)

We found THIS for two weeks later.

And it. was. AWESOME.

Again.

We beat our Komen time by more than 6 minutes.

Next up is Christmas in the Park. I even got the goats signed up for the 1/2 mile reindeer run. If nothing else, they’ll sleep well after all of the afternoon excitement, right?

After that, I’m not sure what happens. Friend is registered for training for the Indy 1/2 marathon. I think I’m hoping Santa wraps up enough money to pay for registration…but every time I see THIS, I wonder if it might be better if he didn’t:

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8 Comments so far
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For me, depression leads to writer’s block, though I do remember a time when I was transitioning out of college and out of structured writing opportunities, the writer’s block of not knowing what to write definitely triggered a downswing.

And BTW, tu es une Comtesse. You can definitely do a 1/2 marathon if you decide to do it!

Comment by Cynical Nymph

You can so totally do it. I know you can!

And I’m with the Nymph, depression leads to writers block because, hey, when you’re depressed you have anhedonia and if you enjoy writing, you know it’s on the verboten list in your cruel, depressed brain.

But you’re showing them! (The brain and the list, I mean…) Ha! Comtesse Power!!!

Comment by Marzie

I look at how far I’ve come in just the last two months, AND all the support I have from my FRIENDS OF WIN (that’d be all of you comtesses, and some others), and I have to agree with you: I can do this.

I think.

(Hey, it’s more than I could have said last year.)

Comment by waltzinexile

Depression breeds the block. Definitely. Why do you think I haven’t blogged in two months? Only after I started to come out of it could I even THINK about that blog. And I’m STILL not totally there yet.

Sometimes other things are just more important. And that’s okay.

Comment by Bejewell

(P.S. I was late to the running game, too. And my commitment to it comes and goes. But it DOES make you feel better, improves your stamina, metabolism, and overall health. And the awesome thing about it is — you can take a break and come back to it any time you want to! Welcome to the club!)

Comment by Bejewell

Thanks for the welcome. I’m the one in the “Yes, I’m slow, get over it” shirt.
That no one can read because I’m at the back of the pack, LOL

Comment by waltzinexile

[…] think I told you that we had a family wedding recently…? When I say “we” I mean 75% of Waltz Family were actually members OF […]

Pingback by Spizzerinctum* « Waltz In Exile

I’ve been writing about not being able to write for like six months. I’m glad you’re running…or should I say, glad you’re a runner.

Comment by jodi




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